It is super cool having new visitors stop by here.  That is a side effect of sending those cartoons that I totally wasn’t thinking of at the time, but it’s nice.  …You see how I made a point of saying that there?  Because I realized at some point today that people might assume I was trolling for traffic.  And I worry about things like that (because heaven forbid that someone I’ve never met should temporarily have a mistaken impression of me.  I also dislike Rod Stewart, cram my freezer full of crap I’ll never eat again, and have a thing for goats.  Because they’re wily.  In case that helps to clear anything up.).  Anyway, there were no ulterior motives.  My brain just grabs onto things and runs with them in strange ways sometimes.   Which is probably better for my popularity than if it was the rest of my body grabbing things and running with them in strange ways.

And since I try very much to be sincere here, I will also mention that I do get a bit of a crazy high from feeling socially validated in even small ways.  …Probably more than I should (Shhhhh…don’t tell the new people!).   I think I may also get smarter.

My little burst of energy has made it a bit more difficult to keep myself from overworking, though.  Remember how I had mentioned that having been so low previously, I was having difficulty keeping a reasonably accurate relative scale for how I’m doing now and what I should be expecting from myself?  Yup.  Still am.

At the beginning of the week, I was hopeful that maybe, possibly, I could try to accomplish some task during a day (one whole thing – wouldn’t that be nifty cool!).  Yesterday, I scheduled car maintenance, had my tires changed, researched mosquito repellants, read a chapter in my self-help book, purchased new furnace filters and miscellaneous hardware supplies, purchased ant and mosquito killing supplies, purchased tea tree and citronella oils, got groceries, implemented the anty death, did the household laundry, phoned my doctor, rescheduled a massage appointment, spoke with my mom, mixed up a batch of essential oil bug repellant based on the morning’s research, made dinner, and probably did at least a few other work tasks that I’m not thinking of right now.  And I was about to do a bunch of putting things away when I was forced to pause.

But we needed the mosquito repellant, see, because we finally got some cheapy patio furniture for our back yard, and we had these grand visions of us eating dinner out there, carefree and laughing, with a steak knife in one hand and a glass of wine in the other, talking about the high points of our day, and maybe politics or philosophy, as the warm spring breeze kissed our hair, and the subtle scent of flowers wafted by.  Except that a couple of evenings ago, when we were out there around dinner time putting the stuff together, we discovered a tiny, itchy, West-Nile-carrying flaw in our dramatic plans.  Important, right?

My husband had to tell me firmly last night that I should not do anything work-related for at least the next couple of days.  No mail, no paperwork, no phone calls, no errands, no shopping, no laundry, no cleaning, no organizing, no work of any kind.  I can see his point.  I’ve been feeling almost able to get things done lately, so I’ve been naturally falling back into go-go-go mode, and getting guilty twinges when I pause to do anything unproductive.  A lot of the time, I live in a state of chipmunk-on-crack activity.  That is a lot of my problem, though.  I need to learn to balance, and to moderate, and not to push myself too hard too fast.  This seems so obvious looking in on the situation that it’s laughable.  In my head, though, woo-boy, I better get on that laundry or the hubby will think I’m a slacker.  And hello?  I can’t work less than an eight hour day now that I’m off work for medical reasons!  And there are things.  And they need doing.  How can I not do things??  I had to think his proposition through for a moment, as I already really had been (unintentionally) creating potential to-do lists in my head for the next few days.  But I agreed in the end.  No work.

At which point, he promptly told me not to fill that time doing nothing but light therapy, and visualization, and meditation, and yoga, and tai chi, and reading self-help books instead.  Because my baby knows me well.  And I was totally mentally crossing out every administrative item and replacing it with something I feel like I “should” be doing from the getting better list instead.

And I may have ended up just sitting down now, at 6:13pm, for my first focused bout of “relaxation time.”  But I had good excuses, I swear.  Okay, maybe not good ones, but excuses.  Okay, maybe I can’t remember what I did between 3 and 6 today.  But I’m sure it was important.  It’s just so freaking hard to STOP when I think I can manage to GO.

I think I currently only come in the flavours of Burnt Out or Hyperdrive.  All poetically cyclic, I know.

Also, in answering comments on the previous post, I realized that stick people cannot hug and kiss at the same time, nor can they look at each other during sex.  Poor stick people.  That would be sad for them.

Large, bulbous heads are not always as much of an asset as one might initially think.

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15 Responses to “Engage”

  1. Zannah says:

    You’re right! I feel sad for stick people now. They’re missing out.

  2. [...] yay for Curiosity!  Check out her award-winning stick-people drawings (here and here).  While I’m at it (finding good stuff online), I went through Steps 1 through 5 just [...]

  3. Sarah P says:

    Has anyone ever told you your tags are pure brilliance?
    Because they are.

    Also, yay, yay, yay for making your health and mind a priority. So easy to forget, but it really is the foundation for everything else, right?

    :) Take it slow.

  4. Curiosity says:

    @Zannah – Aren’t they, though? I had never really thought about it that way before. Not that avoiding thoughts of stick person sex in my daily life is necessarily a bad thing overall…

    @Sarah P – Thank you for your words of encouragement. And I’m so glad you like the tags (and you even missed the phase of household objects filled with chocolate)! That totally makes up for the fact that no one will ever be able to find anything on my site. Sometimes I wish that WordPress would post the totally strange tags in the sidebar instead of the more common ones. That would probably be a lot more interesting all around. I mean, come on, “antidepressants” or “my ass?” Which one would you click?

    As a side note, I was not aware until now that I have posts tagged “my ass.” Apparently I do.

  5. Natalie says:

    Figure B people look like they’re in desperate need of a chiropractor. Ouch. =)

  6. Curiosity says:

    @Natalie – Love hurts.

  7. Elly Lou says:

    I hate Rod Stewart, too. We should probably make out now. Yay!

    Oh, when you start to get annoyed by my ridiculous comments, you can blame Sarah P. It’s her fault I’m here.

  8. Curiosity says:

    @Elly Lou – I don’t think I could ever get tired of comments. …Or ridiculousness. If you were here right now, I would happily make out with you. …Or somewhat awkwardly, at least. …Okay, I wouldn’t, but only because I’m married.

  9. spokeit says:

    It would suck to be a stick.
    and yay for new people! It’s just cause you’re awesome!

  10. Ben says:

    What about stick people with extra long arms? They could hug and kiss, but they would have creepy long arms though which would mean they would be ridiculed through out their life. Either way stick people lose.

  11. Curiosity says:

    @Ben – Stick people with no head also appear to be immune to the problem, but seem to have difficulty with the kissing and/or looking part.

  12. Ben says:

    I guess they would have to resort to 69 everytime…

  13. SuzRocks says:

    uh… so I’m a new random person. Found you through Spokeit who I found through Dooce, who I found through my best friend. It’s a small world.

    Anywho, I have to say that I LOVE the stick people. And I’m relieved to find that there is someone else out there who actually gets worried about what other people think about them on the internet. I try to tell myself it doesn’t matter, but catch myself thinking ‘are they mad at me?’ I’m nuts I believe….

  14. Curiosity says:

    @SuzRocks – Welcome! I love new people. I love random ones extra much. :) …And you are definitely not alone with the worry. I actually find it worse on here than in real life, because at least in real life I can SEE people’s reactions and gauge facial expressions and tone of voice. Here people could be throwing things at the screen and I would never know. Hopefully they’re throwing nice things.

  15. SuzRocks says:

    Yay for Randomness! What gives me comfort is- that if I piss someone off so bad that they throw something at the screen, most likely it’ll break their screen….. Serves them right for getting upset in the first place. Karma’s a bitch.

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